re-lactation

No problem, just see how they go :aww:

It might be an idea to just cuddle up with her from now till the next feed with your top off (maybe in bed with the telly on?) and keep offering the breast. Once she is back being BFd (notice I said IS coz I'm going with some of my world famous PMA!!) she probably wont have a regular feeding pattern like with formula. Hebe goes anything from 1.5 - 4 hrs between feeds now. So if shes awake between now and when you think shed feed next, keep offering that boobie. Even if she doesnt suckle the skin contact will be good honey. And what a fab excuse to lay with your baby and snuggle...get your hubby in there too...x

I quite agree!

Oh yes me too

Thanks for the suggestion Mervs Mum. I stripped her off and cuddled under a blanket with her for two hours even though she never attempted to take my nipple even though I kept offering it to her. When she did wake to feed she never tried to latch, just shook her head when I tried and tried to push me away with her hands.

I think the slower flow teats will help though. I imagine that as soon as she gets used to working for her food then she'll prefer the comfort of my breast. She certainly enjoyed the warmth of lying against me when she was sleeping.

I also tried your suggestion of not looking at the pump, and I looked at her instead. I got my biggest every amount of 20mls (0.5oz) so I was very happy with that.

I'm wondering if co-sleeping might help too. atm she is right next to my bed in her moses basket. I wasn't sure about co-sleeping as I'm not really sure how it would work. I assume there is a way to do it where she is totally safe? ie I wouldn't hurt her in my sleep by accident? Also OH is a military pilot and sleep is pretty important to his job. He'll sleep in the spare room some nights, but in general will co-sleeping make it more difficult for him to sleep?

Since posting I've read some co-sleeping threads on here, and read a few articles I've come across through google. I spoke to my OH about it, and he is keen to try co-sleeping too.

The question is, how do I do it? I don't want Niamh to sleep between me and OH as he is a very deep sleeper so I'd prefer he to just sleep next to me. But then how does that work because she obviously can't be at the edge of the bed? Also I keep reading that infants shouldn't have pillows or blankets near them. Basically I'm not sure what sort of arrangement to have that would be safest for her.

Hi & welcome to the forum, wow you are doing a wonderful job.I really admire yucceour perserverance (sp?) you should be very proud of yourself. Looks like your getting lots of fantastic advise & have support of your midwife & husband so i know you will succeed.
If your worried about little one being on the outerside of the bed i suggest you buy a bed rail,Tomy do one thats about £15 or if you use freecycle ask on there.That way you know baby wont slip out of bed.

Yes getting a bed guard is the best one to get.

The type you get for childrens beds ie babydan ones.

Make sure aswell you don't use your quilt, I used to use a sheet for my top half or use Olivias blanket.

i put Emily in a baby sleepin bag then i know shes warm & much to hubbys disapointment im in long pjs & often socks too!

Oh yeah thats a good idea too.

Oli didn't like them, I will be trying again with this next bub

Great job honey!! Whats the phrase 'Slowly. slowly, catchy, boobie, monkey' !!!

So the milk thing is definately coming so thats another win to put along side the improvment in your nips. Your gorgeous hunk of a military pilot hubby (ok calm down Lisa ) is firmly 'on-board' (jeeeez they are coming thick as fast this morning :icondoh: ) so you are definately very close to even more sucess!!!!

I think the co-sleeping is a great idea too. Hebe is in a moses for much of the time as thats where I put her when she falls to sleep. If she wakes in the night she comes in with us. I dont have her in the middle often for much the same reasons mentioned. I either take her sleeping bag off if its a thick one (I think a thin low tog one would be ok), rearrange the duvet, and I use the moses as a guard which might not be good practice long term but might be ok till you get the guard fitted?? I'm sure someone will say if thats a no-no even very short term.

This is all very positive. Please dont listen to those who say things like 'well if its what you want....' and 'I couldnt' or 'at the end of the day your baby just wants feeding' - they want you to be like them because it makes them feel better about their own choices. This is about you and your family.

I feel like a proper little :boob: :cheer: today!! Go Nic, Go Boobies, Go Niamhy!!!

x

Co-sleeping is great for breastfeeding IMO. Caitlyn sleeps with me and she hardly has to wake me up, I have to re-arrange my boob every so often and that's that! I would suggest a bed gaurd. I'm only just about to buy one, I should have much earlier, she keeps nearly falling off the bed!

I really hope you get what you want from this!

How are things today hun? x

Yes how are things going? :aww:

Hey girls. Sorry I haven't updated. I tried to get on yesterday but for some reason it wouldn't let me post when I was using Safari instead of Firefox.

I had a surprise visit from a BFing counsellor today! I was so happy to see her! She actually stayed with me for two hours talking to me about BFing and then tried to help me feed Niamh. Niamh was having none of it though!

First of all I missed her feeding cues, so by the time I actually went to put her to my breast she was frustrated. I managed to get her latched for a few seconds in the rugby/football position a couple of times before she pushed me away and cried. I expressed and we tried cup feeding her which didn't work at all. The counsellor doesn't think it will work for her either as she's so used to the bottle. She just got more and more upset until we couldn't calm her down at all so we had to formula feed her, which she took straight away and then slept for 6 hours as she'd knackered herself out!

So I've been expressing today but getting hardly anything. I'm going to give it to her for her next feed though, then top up with formula as I only have about 2 oz to give her just now and thts from me expressing 3 times.

I've got a BFing support group to go to tomorrow, and then I have the counsellor and a health visitor coming out on Friday. We're doing away with cup feeding as it was very obvious it's not going to work. Instead we're trying syringe feeding where the counsellor will drop milk off my nipple when Niamh is feeding so that she thinks she's getting the milk from my breast and not having to work too hard for it.

The counsellor warned me that she's now very dependent on the bottle, and I may never be able to BF. She said at least I can express milk for her though. It's not the same, but I guess it's something.

I am just so friggin sick of formula. I hate it! I hate having to wash and steralise bottles. I hate having to wait to warm the bottle while Niamh is crying. I hate how windy, colicky and sick she gets on formula. What i hate the most is that I have perfectly good milk to give her and she won't take it. It breaks my heart when she pushes me away and cries because she wants the bottle and not me! I just sat and cried for ages last night after trying to BF her.

If you keep pumping when she's abit bigger she might be more interested

Yeah I'm definitly going to keep pumping no matter what so I can give her my milk and not formula. Maybe she will take to it better when she's a bit older. I hope so. My OH is starting to get upset seeing me so upset and thinks I shouldn't be pushing the BFing as much as I am. I think if she gets to a month old and isn't BFing then I'm going to get quite upset.

I really hope you can get to where you want to be! I will keep everything crossed for you x

Just had another non-attempt at feeding. I waited for her feeding cues and caught them on time but still couldn't get her to latch or even try to latch tbh. I expressed while OH fed her formula.

I'm watching some BFing DVDs now that the counsellor left but I am feeling so down right now I really want to cry, especially watching the DVDs. They are helpful, but at the same time it's making me so sad that I can't do what all these others Mums are doing.

OH said after the last feeding session that he thinks I should stop trying now as we're not making any progress and I'm getting upset.

I'm really starting to lose confidence.

Tell him that you're determined and you really need his support! I am not giving up hope for you. Keep trying!!

Does anyone know if I could pay a private midwife or counsellor to come and stay with us for a couple of days to help me BF?

toriaaaaTRASH wrote:Tell him that you're determined and you really need his support! I am not giving up hope for you. Keep trying!!

Thanks hun. I did, and when I told him why I want to keep trying I got really choked up. It's not just about giving her breastmilk over formula, but also being able to do something really wonderful for my child and having that special bond with her.

:aww:

Well I am so pleased you're still trying. Most would have given up by now but I think everyone here will tell you that its very much about how much you want it in the early days and obviously you are really up against it with the bad start you had anyway.

6 hours is some sleep!!!! I know some Mums are greatful for those formula 'gut bombs' but the up side of shorter sleeps is that they are awake mre and taking the world in - Hebe spends much of the day awake which is lovely.

Did you get the fenugreek? Hopefully that will help with the supply too. I know I must sound like a stuck record but dont let the amount you can pump put you off - its not a reliable indication of whats going on supply wise etc. also are you making sure you are eating and drinking well? Make sure you are getting lots of fluids down you.

Hebe never gets to the point of crying. I think thats a combination of knowing the cues as you said and the fact that the second I pick up on them, she's fed before she realises herself that she's getting hungry. I'm with you on the sterilising etc - it does my head in that I have to sort the pump out let alone the other stuff!!

How often did they say to pump?? You may need to be doing it every 2 hours day and night if you're to keep a decent supply up until you can get her latched on.

I do think you're gonna do this - I dont know why but I think you'd have jacked it in by now otherwise. Just remember every little drop she gets is better than the formula.

Have you contacted the LLL?? I bet you could hire a LC to help. :aww:

Thanks hun.

I keep reminding myself that expressed milk is not a true indication. I also did what you suggested and looked at Niamh while expressing which helped alot!

I'm the same in that I never normally let Niamh get to the point of crying, and the counsellor pointed out that I'm giving in to formula too easily. I should be soothing her, then trying again. It's so hard to hear your child crying though. It breaks your heart. I'm getting better at spotting the feeding cues earlier now. Sometimes when I know she's due for a feed I#ll pick her up for some skin to skin while she's still sleepy and try her then.

The fenugreek arrived - thank you! I need to go and pick it up from the post office tomorrow morning though as I missed the postie when he came. I'll be using it asap tomorrow though.

I read LLL's website and their advice but I haven't rung them yet as they say on their website that they aren't in my area (moray). However I'm planning on ringing them after my support group tomorrow to see if they can either offer advice, or recommended someone I can talk to. There must be some way I can go private and get the help I need with this. The NHS offer fantastic support, but I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere yet. I suppose at least I know what's not working!